I wanted to give you a decorated pumpkin for Easter. I was going to paint my gorgeous pumpkins to look like Easter eggs. They were going to be the most exquisite Easter pumpkins in the entire universe. The Easter bunny was going to do back flips from sheer ecstasy when he saw my pumpkin eggs. Martha Stewart was going to cry from joy...
Oh, who am I kidding? It's April. I can get behind a Valentine pumpkin and even a St. Patrick's Day pumpkin, but an Easter pumpkin? That's just absurd. I tossed my pumpkins weeks ago. (Bitches were starting to smell like death).
I got you tulips instead:
I adore tulips. They make me want to run and sing and generally embarrass myself.
I hope your weekend is full of love, sunshine and tulips. Happy Easter!