Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Drunk Bear Sighting

While walking in Westwood last week with my sister, I encountered this bear:

I realize this is a stuffed bear, and stuffed animals are inanimate objects... but this is the drunkest bear I've ever seen. 

Or maybe he's just in a sugar coma?  The bear is stationed outside a chocolate shop and could have gone on a truffles bender.  The manager probably thinks this stuffed animal will lure customers inside, but I think the bear serves as a cautionary tale.  I'm pretty sure Aesop wrote a fable about this bear called "The Bear and the Chair."  If memory serves, the bear passes out in a chair from eating too much chocolate and then a tortoise named Goldilocks wins the race... wait, crap, that can't be right. 

Also, this bear is located just a few blocks from UCLA's frat row.  I'm surprised it hasn't been stolen yet as part of some hazing ritual.

p.s. The bear's apron disturbs me, but I'm not sure why.   

p.p.s.  The Center for Disease Control should have this bear on its watch list. Seriously, how many infected toddlers do you think have snotted all over it?  The next time there's a mytery outbreak in Los Angeles, blame the bear.