Wednesday, August 29, 2012

The Wizard of Bras

I'm not making this up. There is actually a store called "The Wizard of Bras." It should be in the Guinness Book of World Records for "Best Store Name in The World" (assuming such a category exists). 

I cannot tell you how many times I've driven past this sign. The Wizard of Bras is located in Monrovia, right off the Myrtle Exit on the 210 East. If you are going to Peach Cafe for breakfast from my house, then you get off at this exit. The Peach Cafe makes the best blueberry pancakes in the world, so Nathan and I often find ourselves taking the Myrtle Exit on weekend mornings. And whenever we exit the freeway, I think, I really need to visit the Wizard.

Recently, we have not been frequenting the Peach Cafe as often as we would like. The service is less than stellar. In fact, one could say it sucks. The kitchen is soooo sloooooow. I do not understand why it takes them so long to make an order of pancakes. Are they laying the eggs themselves?

More importantly, the Peach Cafe is always playing the same Beatles album. (It's the one with Rocky Raccoon). At first, it was kind of endearing. Oh, hey Nathan, they are playing that Beatles album again. Now it just makes my skin crawl. Holy effing crapballs, if I hear Rocky Raccoon one more time, I'm going to smash that stereo and then destroy every Beatles album in the Los Angeles area.

But Peach Cafe's blueberry pancakes are magical, so we keep going back. And we keep driving by the sign for the Wizard of Bras.

Sorry for the tangent. I just had to get that off my chest. (Pun intended). Now back to our regularly scheduled programming. 

I needed some new bras recently. I would ordinarily just go to Nordstroms. Although I am cheap about things like t-shirts and jeans, I am a believer in expensive bras. A bra performs a serious job - perhaps the most serious job in a lady's wardrobe - and I find the expensive models perform better. If I'm going to wear a cheap bra, I might as well stab myself in the chest with some rusty wire - because that is what is going to happen when the bra disintegrates. (In Madrid. While sitting on a park bench with my freshmen roommates, if you must know). 

Instead of Nordstroms, I decided it was finally time to pay a visit to the Wizard.

The Wizard of Bras is a unique bra-shopping experience. I wish I had more photos to share, but the entire store is basically the changing area.  Although I sometimes have a potty mouth, I am not about to post photos of ladies in various states of undress, thank you very much.

When you enter the store, you fill out a slip of paper with some basic information. Then a saleswoman leads you to the back. There are a few bras on display, but mostly there are just curtained, individual changing rooms. My saleswoman (name already forgotten, so let's call her Bianca) took my measurements and asked me what I needed. Then, Bianca disappeared to the back room and returned shortly with a few bras for me to try.

Five minutes later, I had two new bras.

Bianca was very helpful, friendly, and knowledgeable. She also did not to push me into buying more bras than I needed. I wish I remembered her real name so I could give her a shout-out.

The Wizard of Bras is not for everyone. If you like browsing through racks of lingerie, then you should go to Victoria's Secret. But if you are like me, and you get intimidated by racks and racks of possibilities, then the Wizard of Bras is a godsend.

The Wizard of Bras is also not for the painfully shy. I read some Yelp reviews that made it sound like your boobs are on display for the world to see. This is not the case. Every customer tries on her bras in a private, curtained dressing room. But, if you want the benefit of the staff's advice, then you need to expose yourself a little.

I highly recommend the Wizard of Bras to anyone in the Los Angeles area in need of a well-fitted bra. And if you time your trip right, you can stop by the Peach Cafe for blueberry pancakes. (Just remember your ear plugs if you're not in the mood for the Beatles).