In my early 20s, I signed up for too many credit cards. Here's the basic scenario: I would go clothing shopping; the clerk would tell me "sign up for our credit card and get 15% off today's purchase"; and unable to pass up on a discount, I'd sign up for my millionth credit card.
But then I matured into the wise, noble woman I am today [insert laugh track here] and I cancelled my deck of credit cards. For several years, I've solely used my Amazon Visa card. (Because I'm a book junkie, and free money at Amazon is way more valuable than air miles).
Whenever a store clerk offers me a credit card, I tune them out and mutter, "No thanks, not today." I'm not going to sign up for an Old Navy Mastercard just so I can save 15% on a $7 t-shirt. How cheap do I look? (That's a rhetorical question, Mom).
I've been offered the Target Visa card at least a dozen times and every time, I ignored the pitch. I pretended I was paying attention to the clerk's speech; but really, I was thinking about something much more interesting, like (a) whether I want frozen yogurt or ice cream for lunch or (b) what name I would give a panda if the Commission for Naming Cute Baby Pandas ever called me in a panic.
But recently, a Target stores clerk got through to me. Here's what transpired:
Clerk: Would you like to sign up for a Target Visa Card? You will save 5% on all Target purchases.
Courtney: No, thank you. Wait. Did you just say 5% on all Target purchases?
Clerk: Yes. And you get free shipping from the store's website.
Courtney: So wait, that's a 5% discount every time I shop at Target? Not just today?
Clerk: Yes, and free shipping.
Courtney: Really?
Clerk: Yes.
Courtney: Well, sign me up!
At this point, I think there should have been a parade with tubas and elephants. Or, at the very least,Target could have fired a confetti cannon and buried me in an avalanche of balloons. But alas, I just got a piece of paper that's my temporary Target Visa.
Whatever. There's a Target about five minutes from our house, and Target is my source for everything from laundry detergent to birthday cards to everything in between. I am thrilled that I get to save 5% whenever I shop there!*
*I think we all realize I won't actually save 5% every time I shop at Target. Instead, I'll just end up justifying more stupid impulse purchases, and my 5% savings will get spent on Christmas decorations and cute umbrellas that we don't actually need. But shh, don't tell my inner-Scrooge. He's so exuberant about the new credit card, he might actually lift the shoe-buying moratorium that's been in place since April.